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| What can I say...she's a smart woman! |
Two reasons.
1: Unless you are a millionaire, you probably don't own a house with 2 bathrooms within arms reach of the sofa; meaning, you and your loved ones will end up duking it out and inevitably one of you will in make a mess in your pants...or on the floor. It's a no-win. I don't care what you say, no one has bowels of steel that can hold back this kind of rumble. No amount of kegel exercises can stop the wrath of wings and beer!
2: Once the "green apple two step" has occurred, undoubtedly you will regret your decision to have ever brought these tasty treats into the home. Even the Home Depot's maximum powered fart fan won't take care of that nasty aroma staining the walls in your bathroom. Trust me.
Buffalo wings, also known as "hot wings" or "chicken wings" are a delectable treat that are deep fried in oil, un-breaded and usually coated in a vinegar based sauce with a kick of cayenne pepper. Any person suffering from irritable bowel syndrome should steer clear of these spicy bastards. Accompanied by beer and ranch, these tasty fuckers are found mostly in bars as an appetizer or more recently in gastro-pubs as a 'trendy' tapas.
As always, my goal in life is to find the best food, at the best prices, with the best vibes. I hit up my local eateries and tested them not only on the kick of their wings, but their presentation and the service.
Simzy's ( Belmont Shore, Ca)
A new addition to second street but already well known in Manhattan beach, Simzy's offers a decent selection of beers, sangria, and pizzas...other then that, you're over paying for glorified bar food. They offer what are called "15 minute wings", that in reality take 30 minutes. Tasty? Yes. Memorable? Eff no!
Six wings come in one order, and I don't know about you, but I'm a hefty bitch who happens to like more than six wings. It's offensive if you ask me.
Buffalo Wild Wings (Marina Pacifica shopping center, Long Beach Ca)
If you are looking to be overwhelmed with tv's, air conditioning, and too many overweight men with jersey's on, then you've found the right place! Naturally, when researching Buffalo wings in my neighborhood I had to visit the one place with the actual item in the name of the restaurant. Out of all the places I tried, Buffalo Wild Wings definitely offered the largest selection in wings. They offer everything from boneless wings, to "Jammin' Jalapeno" flavored wings. The options are endless. The staff was quick,the wings were ok, and the prices were a reason to go back. Honestly, the one thing I didn't love is that you couldn't get a spicy wing that didn't blow your effin mouth up! There seemed to be a great selection of mild wings and a small selection of "rip your face off" wings...but nothing in between? Their ranch was piss poor and I hated the little cardboard bowls they came in. Overall, I'd visit again, as long as I was wearing my Raiders jersey and rockin' a pot belly.
Legends (Belmont Shore, Ca)
As a staple in the Belmont Shore community, Legends has always provided a great atmosphere and a great place to enjoy a beer while watching your fave sunday teams. Who knew their food was so god damn tasty? First of all I loved the fact that when you order the wings, they come out within a mere 15 minutes and they are presented to you in a giant bucket. YES! Buckets of wings? I think YES! Their original wing is spicy but still edible and their ranch is thick and creamy. Because the front of the building is open to second street it makes the breeze and people watching a great part of enjoying the tasty wings.
Final conclusion, Legends kicks ass when it comes to wing-tastic dining. Just remember what I said. Find the nearest bathroom, and don't wait till its too late, or you'll be sorry.
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